The Upsides.

nuditea:

“when one door closes, another one opens”

imagine how annoying it would be if that were true

you close the bathroom door to pee and your front door suddenly blows open

your cat escapes

you run out and jump into the car to chase the cat and hear everything falling out of your over-stuffed pantry as its door unlatches

(via drwhom)

Some profanity I’d like to hear more often:

tittybasket:

1800chokethath0e:

lucatastrophe:

• “For the sake of fuck”
• “For shitting out loud”
• “For the fuck of God”
• “Don’t go fucking yourself in the foot”
• “I hope I don’t fuck the toaster on this”
• “Fuckwad”
• “Cocktard”
• “Shitbeak”
• “Cuntsteak”
• “Dunderfuck”

cuntsteak i’m gonna use that one.

These are magical, and I need to not fuck some toasters today

(via somesensualsweets)